photo courtesy of waterstain
oh, i became like million of americans earlier this evening when i became a new owner of a cell phone. yes yes yes... i'm FINALLY and owner of a cell phone. now you can call my cell. "hey, call my cell", "hey, do you know my cell number?", "hey, i'll have my cell on me if you get lost"... now I can say all those things and mean them.
isn't life grand?
i felt like shopping today... it doesn't happen too often, so i thought i would go with it.
i got underwear and bras and a dress and a shirt/skirt thing... oh, and i bought a cell phone. hee hee... but yeah, i went to the mall to buy jeans and nylons... notice neither of those things are in the list of what i bought...
jeans... they annoy me, cause i guess i have a weird shaped body. so yeah i'm chunky... but my gutt gets in the way... or else i'd be able to fit into other jeans... so if i get the jeans that fit my gut... they'll be ridiculously baggy on me. i don't want that. and if i don't get the ones that fit my gutt, then i can't really get them on. so it's a no win situation, except when i find those rare, rare, rare jeans that are made for me.
so, i'm planning on talking to michael tonight. from like 1130-1. i told him that i can't stay up past one anymore. i mean, look what happened today. i frickin called in sick for no real reason. but the weird thing is, is i don't care. like i don't feel responsible. i almost feel that mellon owed me this. but i sent michael my picture today. the one of me, christa and deb in seattle. he thought i was cute. i was so worried that things would blow up if we ever met, ya know? like we didn't find each other attractive or something.
we had a talk about "us" last night. not that there is an "us"... that's what our convo was about basically. ya see, i was feeling like he was thinking that there was an "us" and i wanted to talk about it, cause i didn't want it. turns out, he doesn't think there's an "us". not now anyway. but he said that based on my personality, i'm beautiful. i don't know... i guess it's flattering, but it's so taboo almost. not taboo, but like, i don't know, i can't explain it. i feel like i'm doing something that i shouldn't be, even though there really is nothing at all between us. ya know?
ugh.... what's my problem? well when i went out with gietz and yeargs this weekend, i found out that gietz was dating one of his clients. so i felt a little better, because someone else in this world, that i know, is doing the same sorta thing. not that it makes it right... but i can justify it.
maybe i really am fucked up. i mean, i don't think so, but i don't know...